Ewan over Gallo any day, of course

In a related Gallo story, lower down you'll find this super-obvious statement:

"No need then for a dab of Donna Crème, a new product that claims to heighten le plaisir au feminin, which has just been launched with the utmost decorum on the Croisette. Unfortunately it comes without McGregor."

Of course it doesn't include Ewan. If it did, then we wouldn't need the cream in the first place!