Say it ain't so, Gio

I refuse to believe that this piece of gossip about my beloved husband Giorgio is even vaguely true -- even if it did come from my beloved BANG! Showbiz gossip feed:

Paris Hilton is reportedly dating George Clooney.
The socialite fueled speculation of a romance after recently enjoying an “intimate” evening with the ‘Burn After Reading’ star at the Whiskey Bar at the Sunset Marquis hotel in Hollywood, according to Life and Style Weekly magazine.
A source said: “Paris and George sat and talked together for ages. They didn’t seem to be aware of anyone else in the room.”
The following evening, Paris, 27, was seen sitting beside 47-year-old George at a dinner at a Hollywood restaurant, with other guests including director Ridley Scott and Brittany Flickinger, winner of ‘Paris Hilton’s My New BFF’ show.

Cloonacy

I hope Cloomydia isn't bad for a baby...

All My Georges

Okay, so my husband is gorgeous, charming, funny... yeah, yeah, we all know that already.

What I'm finding funny lately, and what this clip reinforced for me today, is how much, as he gets gently older, he's beginning to look like my dad.

(oh, yes, Dad's a hottie. Hands off, ladies!)

News I didn't need to know about my husband and his, um, measurements

The latest on Clooney from BANG Showbiz Media, our celebrity news feed. And I post it here in full instead of linking, because we are a family paper and probably won't be running it online:

George Clooney is using a 'Liberator Sex Ramp' to aid lovemaking after being injured in a motorbike crash.
The Hollywood heartthrob and girlfriend Sarah Larson appear to need a little extra help in the bedroom after Clooney was photographed leaving his New York townhouse carrying the purple sloped sex cushion on Wednesday (03.10.07).
A source said: "George is suffering a little from his fractured rib and Sarah has her leg in plaster because of her broken toe so they've bought something to make having sex a little more comfortable."
The Sex Ramp Sex Cushion is available on the internet for $149.00 and comes in blue, purple, red, tan and leopard print. It claims it can "elevate your lovemaking 10 to 14 inches for more options off the side of the bed and superior doggie-style position. The Sex Ramp is engineered to support two bodies in motion, it's the stabiliser that elevates Sex Ramp Sex Cushion beyond vanilla pillow status."
The 46-year-old actor and the 28-year-old cocktail waitress were injured after George's bike collided with a car in Weehawken, New Jersey, on September 21.
When the couple stepped out three days after the crash to attend the New York premiere of his new movie 'Michael Clayton' the star revealed: "We are just resting for now. You don't really want to rub or massage parts that are broken or anything!"
But if the couple do want to get out the massage oil, the Sex Ramp manufacturers boast: "Underneath, a silky liner that cools and caresses. This smooth nylon layer was created to accommodate all of your lotions, potions and gourmet notions."
When George and Sarah's injuries heal, the Sex Ramp makers advise using the cushion to make upright positions comfortable. The instructions state: "Standing is a man's 'power position' sexually, allowing for stronger thrusting, more varied strokes and greater longevity."
The purple cushion is 24 inches long, 18 inches wide and 12 inches tall and fitted neatly under George's arm as he carried it down the steps of his house.

Believe it or not, that's with some copy editing. Also, the photo was taken while he was filming a scene from his new Coen Brothers movie. So no, it was not for his personal use. Who knew British journos were so sloppy?