Raptors on Hoverboards

Oh, yeah, that's my hometown, baybee. I don't get the reference, but it just seems to make sense anyway.

I know a lot of you have been worried about me because there's been radio silence on this here board for several weeks. And I won't lie to you, it's been a shitty time. My ex turned out to be a Jekyll and Hyde asshole, who had been lying to me for the better part of 2008. And G doesn't exactly want to marry me quite as much as I do him. Happy Holidays, indeed.

But in rough times, your true friends are there for you, being awesome. And I have to say, I've been blessed with some very very supportive folks who have taken excellent care of me -- lending an ear as I go on and on, taking me out to entertain and distract me, giving me a port in the storm to escape to, or just rocking out. Big hugs and love to Jay, Trilby, Lynn, Tussy, Andrew, Jane, Denise, Josh, Jess, Jonathan, Margaret, Michael, Jason, Kendra, Ellie, Rodger, Isabel, Amanda, Brian, Ian, Zanne, Ron, Carlos, Pierrette, David, Simona, and my folks. I don't know how I would have kept my head above water without you all. But I do know that would never even be something to worry about, because I'll always have you close to my heart.

I'm off to New Haven this week, to ring in a well-deserved new year with old friends, in fine fashion and with many bubbles. I wish you all the best, and I look forward to catching up more soon.

Also known as Frozen Lobster Bisque

Whenever I visit my Sacramento friends, Ben and I make ice cream. On the 2001 or 2002 visit, I started playing with the idea of lobster ice cream, which Ben politely vetoed. Understandably so -- it's fair if he didn't want his ice cream maker to have a lingering scent of the sea. Also, who wants lobster in Sacramento?

On a later trip to visit friends on the Cape (who also have an ice cream maker), my suggestion was once again shot down. At least this time I had the geography right!

The proposal to Häagen-Dazs didn't make it, but Steph made an excellent point about the "psychology of flavour." So I recently got my *own* ice cream maker, have some lobster stock waiting in the freezer, and am planning to make "frozen lobster bisque" for my next dinner party.

Or, apparently, I could just order in from Maine...

Ko-thario and me -- more banter

He replied! Funny, charming, lots in common, cute. Looks like a tall dark Jewish Michael Cera.
Even though he's made this whole quest public, I'm not going to post his e-mail here without his consent. But I did write back again:

...67 replies -- behold the power of Grub Street! I'm glad you didn't stop counting at 69, too cliché and puerile. That said... the last time I went to a Trivia Night, our team name was "We're Not Gynecologists, But We'll Take a Look." So of course our final, losing, score was 69. The trivia master was at a loss for words.

I'm an omnivore / recipe anthologist / windowbox gardener / online journalist. I have a Master's in Journalism, but beat reporting isn't really my style. It also pays about as well as abstract expressionism, I suspect. So now I run the online events calendar for a major newspaper, as well as all the new-fangled mobile action. If you absolutely need to check the baseball score while we're out to dinner and you have a cell phone handy, I'm your girl.

I also used to edit a magazine for NYU, and my dad was a physics professor, so I still have a soft spot in my heart for academia.

Is there really that much demand for abstract expressionist porn music? Do you have sexy librarian glasses you toss aside just before breaking into a pole dance?

--Maggie

PS: I like your smile.I hope it's not really *that* rare.

And then I saw the latest update on Grub Street. I was one of only five people he wrote back to! (though I was also one of nine people who mentioned Brazilian waxes, alas.)

Grub Street posted the update at 4:15, and I didn't send off my reply until 5 -- I had it open on my desktop since this morning, but it's been a hectic day at work. If I'd finished up a little sooner, I might have more interesting gossip for you.

Stay tuned!

With uni you get two

Grub Street tells of a funny foodie mensch who's looking for a Ko-date on Craigslist. B insisted that I reply (if this works out, he will have only himself to blame...):

Hello, you hysterically funny foodie!

I'm not a Brazilian porn star, but I have gotten an occasional brazilian, and I always find rock star parking. Haven't played Rock Band yet, but my 11-year-old niece got me hooked on Guitar Hero. But I digress...

Baggage -- does my Samsonite wheelie bag count? Because, seriously, it's amazing. Ten years old, travels with me about every other weekend on average, it's been as far as Japan and the Caribbean, doubles as a cat bed whenever I forget to put it away, and it's still going strong. Also, it may have saved my life, as I was dropping it off for repairs instead of commuting down to the WTC on the morning of September 11.

I speak five languages. Unfortunately, Dutch is not one of them. That said, if you're "romantically forking foie gras into [my] mug," I'll let you cop a feel. Left or right breast, your choice -- each is magnificent. Feed me uni too, and you can touch both.

You want a link? Here.
You want a picture? There's one in this post.

Ko ho,
Maggie

Hmm, I might have to make an OK Cupid profile out of that.

Fine fine, you were right

I'm not pregnant.

Shut up.

In other news -- Lollapalooza this weekend! Party on! Unfettered! Free! Crazy!

Houston Livestock Show And Rodeo!

I'm off to see me some Beyonce on a flatbed!

forgive me, please...

I realize that I was gone for a while from these pages, and since I've been back, all I've been doing is quick funny links. I haven't told you about my life in forever, and I'm sorry.

It is a sad irony that just when life gives me lots of material to write about, it gives me no time to write. This is compounded by the fact that I only have computer access at work. But I've been writing posts in my Palm, and I promise to put those up soon. They'll be backdated with the actual date I wrote them, so don't be too confused.

In the meantime, a quick update:
I went to Dublin on 24 hours notice for a bender weekend with Nicfit and the Biker.

While I was there, my grandmother died. I tried to fly back early, but there were no flights (everything sold out), so I flew back Sunday night as planned, re-packed my bags, and headed out to Chicago at 6 am Monday morning.
Spent last week in Chicago for funeral/family activities. Came back Thursday.

Friday was Dr. Muffy's birthday party. Saturday was my fabulous birthday brunch, where everyone got together and got me a Nano! SO I can run with it! As soon as I get headphones that don't exacerbate my TMJ. Saturday night went to excellent Halloween parties with Amanda and Big D, in my last-minute-tossed-together Barbarella costume.

Sunday ran 5 mile race with Dr. Muffy, and we did excellent!

Wednesday was my Birthday Pub Night.

Yesterday was my most excellent birthday dinner of MEAT.

Today is the big day! I am officially OLD! Also, have officially sworn off younger men. What exactly constitutes "younger" has yet to be determined, but I am definitely abandoning the former goal of dating guys who were *in* junior high when I was *teaching* junior high (which roughly equals guys who are 6 to 9 years younger than me.

Tonight I drive up to Homecoming, then tomorrow on to Boston for some quality birthday time with the parents.

Monday I will have more info for you all. For now, I love you.